Many of us in the world have seen panhandlers, beggars, and others whom we generally describe as homeless in our day to day lives. They seem to be a ubiquitous part of big cities and come in all descriptions. I have seen homeless people in the US though more prominently here in Utah where I have called home for almost twenty five years of my life as well as in Russia which was my adopted home for almost two years. One common thread wove through those who genuinely needed help and that was that they had fallen so far as to have little to no control over their lives and lived from day to day, minute to minute, being buffeted back and forth by the winds and waves that make up the storm of their lives. Some even die under those colossal storm ravaged skies.
Here in the US, I would say about half of the homeless were under the ravages of substance abuse and I categorize, alcohol, tobacco and drugs all as substance abuse. If money given in handouts and assistance is converted to these substances instead of food, clothing or shelter, then these are the ones I speak of. In Russia drugs were very uncommon. There tobacco was cheap and alcohol, usually vodka or beer was a staple of purchases among the homeless and usually if you saw someone homeless, they were drunk as well, particularly in the winter. It was sad when someone would be drunk in winter to stave off the cold and they would pass out, only to be buried in the heavy snow, not to be seen again until spring. Horrifying, yes. it was however, the reality there and for many it was a slippery slope to that condition.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, also known as the LDS Church or the Mormon church generally discourages its members from giving handouts to those who are panhandling or begging as it promotes that kind of activity and does nothing to help those who suffer from chronic homelessness from improving their lives and becoming a true functional member of society. I see the panhandlers in many places, most recently along freeways and parking lot exits. On occasion I would see someone truly homeless and my heart wishes to reach out to them and help them help themselves. An occurrence like that happened tonight though, to my wife's credit, she spotted him and moved first.
We had gone to an inexpensive local diner, Village Inn by name.Great tasting simple fare with a marketing centered on their pies. We wanted to eat out tonight and though we had eaten out more lately, probably more than we should, it was her desire and I wasn't going to object.
We had worked our way through most of our meal and were only a few minutes from leaving when a heavily coated man came in with a long gray beard and dark hair came shuffling in. He reeked of tobacco and had dark skin though with Caucasian features. He was so dirty and unkempt he could have been Hispanic, White, American Indian or any mixture by race and looked between 35 and 65 years old. Honestly, I could believe any of those ages or races. His voice was very familiar to me though until now I couldn't place it. I knew the man was not the gentle elderly man he sounded like but he had a gentle calming effect, almost like a friend just wanting a bit of help.
Initially we just watched him and the waitress asked him what he would like. He asked for coffee and she went to get it for him. As she was in the kitchen, he began picking up bits of food off of the floor, under and around tables and really anywhere he could spot. This really caught my wife's attention and I really couldn't see him as she was facing where he was working and I was not. She started describing in a hushed tone what he was doing and we were trying to decide if he was scrounging for crumbs to wash down with the coffee or whether he was doing a simple "chore" in exchange for food. He seemed quite thorough and I could believe either. As she came out, though, he asked the price of the coffee and she replied $2.19 which seemed exorbitant, except they serve coffee by the pot. He asked for a to-go cup of coffee instead and she said OK but it would still be the same price. Not knowing the price, it seemed clear, he was not working there for a handout and though she was courteous, she was probably restricted in what she could do so as to not encourage a flood of people into the restaurant if word got out.
This pretty well decided the matter for my sweet wife. She whispered, half asking, half-telling me she wanted to get him something, like a sandwich. She stood up looking to me for assent, which I promptly gave. She seemed clearly moved and under the direction of the spirit. He seemed to be giving up as the coffee was more than he had, so he was headed for the door. She stopped him and offered to buy him a sandwich. he shuffled back, sounding quite confused. I had taken over on feeding our baby which she had been doing prior to this. She took the menu from the waitress and opened it before him. She basically opened the whole menu to this choosing which had me initially concerned. if he was faking his slow-wittedness, which seemed genuine, he could easily take advantage of the situation and either order a lot or order expensive. However, either due to being slow or the lack of the ability to read, she just prompted a few items to him including breakfast platters, sandwiches and hamburgers. he perked a bit at hamburger and s asked for that. She looked over the selection and suggested a cheeseburger. He agreed and so she ordered a double cheeseburger with fries for him. He sat down and waited a bit for his meal. My dear wife, then ordered a pie for us to take home to the kids and then went to wash her hands. He was that dirty! Coming back a few minutes later we waited a bit for me to finish my meal and then stood to pay and leave.
As we approached the counter to pay, the waitress came out with his meal and he said, "What kind of hamburger is that?" He didn't sound angry, but stunned. She said it was a double cheeseburger and he replied again, "How come it was so BIG?" She replied that they came that big. he then commented on the downhill slide of his surprise that he would not be able to finish the fries. My sweetheart smiled overhearing that and the waitress telling him he could take the rest that he didn't eat to a friend or to eat later. We both chuckled lightly at that and finished paying for our meal.
As we pulled through the parking lot, we passed the window where he was eating. Granted a hamburger is not the most nutritious of meals but it was one which would fill him up and hopefully put a glint of light in his eye. He was eating well and seemed generally astonished about the portion given him. It was as we were passing him that my companion mentioned a part I had missed. She had heard him ask where the garbage cans were and the waitress' reply that they had a dumpster in the back. Initially I think we had thought that he was asking where to put the bits of food he picked up but after our experience we both decided he was looking for more food than the meager handful of crumbs! we decided he had intended to go and root around in the dumpster like a dog! That was the icing on the cake for my sweetheart in that we gave him a respectable meal to eat as a person and not a dog. He was, in her eyes, in our eyes a son of God, made in the image of the Father and though deeply tormented by his life's condition, for one night, could eat well and move on to a tomorrow, a little less hungry.
We have been commanded to be far less judgmental than our natural inclination would have us be and be much more compassionate. I felt, as I am sure my wife did, the bowels of mercy of the Lord yearning to help this man. My wife, answered his call given through the promptings of the spirit, to give that compassion to him. It brings to mind Matthew chapter 25 verses 35-40 which in part read, "I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat, i was thirsty and ye gave me drink... Then shall the King answer and say, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." Despite this experience, I likely won't be a nickel's more generous to panhandlers or beggars waiting for a handout. However, it has given me opportunity to better recognize the promptings of the spirit when he really does want me to reach farther and dig deeper to help someone, even if it is for simply a bit of meat.
Here in the US, I would say about half of the homeless were under the ravages of substance abuse and I categorize, alcohol, tobacco and drugs all as substance abuse. If money given in handouts and assistance is converted to these substances instead of food, clothing or shelter, then these are the ones I speak of. In Russia drugs were very uncommon. There tobacco was cheap and alcohol, usually vodka or beer was a staple of purchases among the homeless and usually if you saw someone homeless, they were drunk as well, particularly in the winter. It was sad when someone would be drunk in winter to stave off the cold and they would pass out, only to be buried in the heavy snow, not to be seen again until spring. Horrifying, yes. it was however, the reality there and for many it was a slippery slope to that condition.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, also known as the LDS Church or the Mormon church generally discourages its members from giving handouts to those who are panhandling or begging as it promotes that kind of activity and does nothing to help those who suffer from chronic homelessness from improving their lives and becoming a true functional member of society. I see the panhandlers in many places, most recently along freeways and parking lot exits. On occasion I would see someone truly homeless and my heart wishes to reach out to them and help them help themselves. An occurrence like that happened tonight though, to my wife's credit, she spotted him and moved first.
We had gone to an inexpensive local diner, Village Inn by name.Great tasting simple fare with a marketing centered on their pies. We wanted to eat out tonight and though we had eaten out more lately, probably more than we should, it was her desire and I wasn't going to object.
We had worked our way through most of our meal and were only a few minutes from leaving when a heavily coated man came in with a long gray beard and dark hair came shuffling in. He reeked of tobacco and had dark skin though with Caucasian features. He was so dirty and unkempt he could have been Hispanic, White, American Indian or any mixture by race and looked between 35 and 65 years old. Honestly, I could believe any of those ages or races. His voice was very familiar to me though until now I couldn't place it. I knew the man was not the gentle elderly man he sounded like but he had a gentle calming effect, almost like a friend just wanting a bit of help.
Initially we just watched him and the waitress asked him what he would like. He asked for coffee and she went to get it for him. As she was in the kitchen, he began picking up bits of food off of the floor, under and around tables and really anywhere he could spot. This really caught my wife's attention and I really couldn't see him as she was facing where he was working and I was not. She started describing in a hushed tone what he was doing and we were trying to decide if he was scrounging for crumbs to wash down with the coffee or whether he was doing a simple "chore" in exchange for food. He seemed quite thorough and I could believe either. As she came out, though, he asked the price of the coffee and she replied $2.19 which seemed exorbitant, except they serve coffee by the pot. He asked for a to-go cup of coffee instead and she said OK but it would still be the same price. Not knowing the price, it seemed clear, he was not working there for a handout and though she was courteous, she was probably restricted in what she could do so as to not encourage a flood of people into the restaurant if word got out.
This pretty well decided the matter for my sweet wife. She whispered, half asking, half-telling me she wanted to get him something, like a sandwich. She stood up looking to me for assent, which I promptly gave. She seemed clearly moved and under the direction of the spirit. He seemed to be giving up as the coffee was more than he had, so he was headed for the door. She stopped him and offered to buy him a sandwich. he shuffled back, sounding quite confused. I had taken over on feeding our baby which she had been doing prior to this. She took the menu from the waitress and opened it before him. She basically opened the whole menu to this choosing which had me initially concerned. if he was faking his slow-wittedness, which seemed genuine, he could easily take advantage of the situation and either order a lot or order expensive. However, either due to being slow or the lack of the ability to read, she just prompted a few items to him including breakfast platters, sandwiches and hamburgers. he perked a bit at hamburger and s asked for that. She looked over the selection and suggested a cheeseburger. He agreed and so she ordered a double cheeseburger with fries for him. He sat down and waited a bit for his meal. My dear wife, then ordered a pie for us to take home to the kids and then went to wash her hands. He was that dirty! Coming back a few minutes later we waited a bit for me to finish my meal and then stood to pay and leave.
As we approached the counter to pay, the waitress came out with his meal and he said, "What kind of hamburger is that?" He didn't sound angry, but stunned. She said it was a double cheeseburger and he replied again, "How come it was so BIG?" She replied that they came that big. he then commented on the downhill slide of his surprise that he would not be able to finish the fries. My sweetheart smiled overhearing that and the waitress telling him he could take the rest that he didn't eat to a friend or to eat later. We both chuckled lightly at that and finished paying for our meal.
As we pulled through the parking lot, we passed the window where he was eating. Granted a hamburger is not the most nutritious of meals but it was one which would fill him up and hopefully put a glint of light in his eye. He was eating well and seemed generally astonished about the portion given him. It was as we were passing him that my companion mentioned a part I had missed. She had heard him ask where the garbage cans were and the waitress' reply that they had a dumpster in the back. Initially I think we had thought that he was asking where to put the bits of food he picked up but after our experience we both decided he was looking for more food than the meager handful of crumbs! we decided he had intended to go and root around in the dumpster like a dog! That was the icing on the cake for my sweetheart in that we gave him a respectable meal to eat as a person and not a dog. He was, in her eyes, in our eyes a son of God, made in the image of the Father and though deeply tormented by his life's condition, for one night, could eat well and move on to a tomorrow, a little less hungry.
We have been commanded to be far less judgmental than our natural inclination would have us be and be much more compassionate. I felt, as I am sure my wife did, the bowels of mercy of the Lord yearning to help this man. My wife, answered his call given through the promptings of the spirit, to give that compassion to him. It brings to mind Matthew chapter 25 verses 35-40 which in part read, "I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat, i was thirsty and ye gave me drink... Then shall the King answer and say, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." Despite this experience, I likely won't be a nickel's more generous to panhandlers or beggars waiting for a handout. However, it has given me opportunity to better recognize the promptings of the spirit when he really does want me to reach farther and dig deeper to help someone, even if it is for simply a bit of meat.
1 comment:
http://approachingjustice.net/2014/05/07/should-mormons-give-money-to-panhandlers/
I always thought Mormon doctrine was clear on how to handle panhandlers... to freely give without judgment.
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