Fathers

I know a lot of people. At least I know more than what I thought I knew. Many of those people I am familiar with their fathers or I am aware of the relationships they had or didn't have with their fathers. Some are shining examples of what fathers should be. Others fall into the "less effective" categories of fathers. I consider myself somewhere in the middle.
In doing family history, I have also come across many examples along the same spectrum of fathers that all had histories that either commend them or condemn them. However, the overwhelming pattern that rose to the surface is the attitudes, commitments, and general well-being of the father was reflected in the family. Strong, protective, supportive father, begat a strong family. This is not to say the mother had no effect, but what I have seen is that the mothers influence seemed to be more individualistic. As their relationships grew close with their mothers, they were more secure, confident individuals. As many children related with their fathers in more of the "group" family sphere, there effects were more obviously seen in the group.
I would share some examples in my own life either as a father or as a son but I feel it would not reflect accurately on the picture as a whole. I will say this, the saying,"Like father, like son," has endured over time for a reason. Much of a daughters character is seen in her father and rarely do they become exact copies of their mothers in miniature. I look at my daughters in this light and they all tend to exude the same cornballish, humorous personality that their father has than the more passive -- mature personality of their mother. This is especially evident in my second daughter Bethany who has not only a tender heart (from her mother) but a wry sense of humor that quite often gets her into more trouble and more laughs than the others.
I wonder how life would be different if I had a different father. I wonder if my own personality would be different. I even wonder how life would have been different if I had no father. Heaven knows that had been a possibility a number of times with the various industrial accidents that have been near fatal in my fathers life. Heavy industry s aptly named and when it involves steel which standard measures is in tons, it is no surprise people die while working there.
As for myself, I am quite certain that if I suddenly checked out, either by accident, heart attack, or otherwise, my kids would be affected for life. My wife might easily go insane, and my family's whole world would be shaken, even at its very foundations. I don't plan on going anywhere but life doesn't always go as planned. Sometimes, God has very different ideas for our future than we do. I am assured that His plans, are calculated to give us the best chance at returning to Him, and our Heavenly Mother, with everyone who will, living and the dead. After all isn't every father's greatest hope that their children will return to them someday as equals in their sight, knowing what they know , doing as they do, and becoming what they themselves are?

Church History Library

I attended the Church History Library dedication today with my Dad. We arrived an hour before it started and proceeded to sit on some moderately hard chairs, just watching everybody. The dedication addresses were good but they did seem to be about what was expected. I did enjoy President Thomas S. Monson's talk greatly though. After President Hinckley, it has been hard for a new person at the helm to grow on me, but he is. He is growing on me.
I have been fascinated with the Church history Library as a whole and have for a while, coveted the idea working there. I could say that my relationship with Heidie Davis whom, I had in the past butted heads with has been successfully repaired largely due to her own efforts. In a way, I miss her at the vault but I don't believe she misses it. If she ever returned, I don't know she would be happy. Pauline and I have enjoyed each other and I think she is someone I could really work for and enjoy. I know little about conservation and so I am uncertain I could get far with Chris McAfee. I really think I could be happy there.
I would love to peruse the Church History Library and plan on making use of it. I would love so much to spend more time there but my distance out at the vault makes that hard. I want to grow in the church corporate sphere but I am uncertain where that would get me. Maybe someday i will be fortunate enough to serve in a different capacity that pays better. We'll see.

A lot of work to do and a lot of nowhere to go with it

I have been really moody of late. Over the past six months or so I have been treading water switching from one project to another trying to get something done. Aside from doing Family History research, I also am wrapped up in writing about 6 different books, mostly novels and trying my darnedest to get one of them done. There is so much to do at home that much of my time is focused there and the above two things seem to spend a lifetime on the back burner before they are done. I know I am a good historian and I am a pretty good writer. One thing I am not very good at is shifting gears from one project to another.

I have taken to doing my own Family History work during lunchtimes at work. This has largely been a success but the difficulty lies with the fact that I only have a 1/2 hour lunch. By the time I am really getting into a groove, it is time to pack up and get back to the work they paid me for. On Sundays I am scanning pictures of my own and family. Last night I scanned over 150 but I haven't cataloged any of them yet. I have thousands yet to do as well as finding my negative scanner tray and scanning the film negatives I have. I am sure it is somewhere in my office. During the week, i try to keep up with everything else, House, Cars, garden, yard at large, as well as pitching and doing my share of taking care of the kids like fixing meals, doing laundry, helping with homework (not for 3 more months now, Yay!) and addressing the specific needs of my kids. Now I know why guys go gray and bald so fast.

Some might advise me to give up on one thing or another to lighten the load. However with each thing I find a necessary link. My book writing is my creative outlet. Far less expensive and less messy than painting, it is also something that may make me famous and maybe rich someday. Whee!!!! Family History for others is intended to supply me with supplemental income. Personal Family History is because of two reasons. We are commanded to and gosh darn it, I love to do it. The house, yard, cars, etc just comes with the life of a homeowner who needs to drive to get anywhere.

Hopefully I can wrap up some of the smaller components of each and feel less crowded. Fortitude I need but I need time more.